Snake Custom Codecs
by Systema
Summary: What if?: these characters were in brawl what should have been when snake used the codec on them? A crossover between super smash bros, Metal gear and of course, many others
1. Chapter 1: Lara Croft

Snake custom codecs: What if these characters were in brawl? , Episode 1

The codec is calling to Otacon:

"Man, this woman is much sexier than Samus."As Snake is talking with himself.

"Who are you talking to, Snake?" as Otacon questions Snake.

"Some British artifactor" As Snake answers to Otacon.

"You mean Lara croft?" Otacon said.

"Lara croft was created in November, 1996. Known as Tomb Raider, Lara croft actually worked for Natla but that double crossing retarded woman betrayed her." As Otacon explained Snake.

"Yep, I know what it feels like. A person who you trust but just betray you." As Snake feels sorry for Lara's past.

"But Snake, she has now her own team made by her and two guys: Alister and Zip. Just like us, man, it looks like the first time we made this team." When, Otacon says about their similarities in the end.

"Yes, but she is still hot and... huh? WAIT, WHAT THE...AAAAARGH" As snake is shot by someone.

"Snake, what's going on? Snake, Snake!" as Otacon was worried.

"I'm alright, Otacon." As snake says to Otacon.

"Who did this to you?" As Otacon questioned.

"Samus." As Snake answers.

"Ohhhh, that's NO GOOD, Snake." As Otacon says.

"....." as Snake gets angry.

The codec turns off.

Note: When snake is saying about his feeling for Lara's past. Is because he was betrayed by Gray Fox just Like Lara was betrayed by Natla and When, Otacon says that's no good. Is joke based on the adventures of sonic the hedgehog which one of Sonic's lines in the show.

© Konami, Nintendo( based on the super smash bros. codecs.), SEGA( The Sonic joke), Toby Gard, Core Design, Crystal Dynamics, and Square Enix(Yep, they now own Tomb Raider).


	2. Chapter 2: The joker

Snake Custom Codecs: what if these characters were in brawl? Part 2

The codec is calling to Mei-Ling.

"Mei-Ling, what is this clown?" As Snake questioned Mei-Ling.

"That's the Joker, Snake." As Mei-ling answered to Snake.

"The Joker first appeared in the DC's Action Comics. He was originally an unknown person with a cancer that made him crazy." As Mei-Ling reveals his past.

"No reason, he looks like Michael Jackson." As Snake thinks about Joker's skin.

"Hey, give Michael some respect. He died, you know?" As Mei-Ling responds to Snake!

"Sorry." As Snake quietly says.

"Anyways, than this unknown person became the Joker, the Bat-man's arch-nemesis and the master of the death jokes!" As Mei-Ling answers!

"Man, this guy is more psycho than a mantis that reads games!" As Snake said to Mei-Ling.

"I knew you were going to say about your pal." As Mei-Ling references to someone.

"Hey, he almost killed Meryl!" As Snake shouts to Mei-Ling.

"Sorry." As Mei-Ling says sorry to Snake's feelings."

"And plus...Didn't Robin or the Dark Batman killed him?" As Snake question.

"Dark Batman? Oh, you mean___"

As the codec turns off before Mei-Ling finished her line.

© Konami, Nintendo, Warner Bros (for the dark knight movie giving me the idea.). , DC comics and Frank Miller

Note: The more psycho than a mantis that reads games joke. Is based on the Psycho Mantis/Screaming Mantis boss in the Metal gear solid series in which he reads games from your memory card (except in Metal Gear Solid 4) and the Dark Batman is actually Terry McGinnis from Batman Beyond.


	3. Chapter 3:Master Chief

Snake Custom Codecs: what if these characters were in brawl? Part 3

The codec is calling to colonel.

"This guy has the same attitude as me." As Snake is talking to himself.

"Watch out, Snake that's Master Chief." As Colonel explained to Snake.

"His official name, Master Chief Petty Officer first appeared in Halo. He's a super cybernetic enhanced super-soldier. Watch out snake, even if his serious, he's also deadly." As Colonel surprised Snake!

"What are you calling me weak?" As Snake questioned Colonel.

"Nope, I 'm not calling you weak. Is because he is a SPARTAN." As Colonel answered Snake.

"So, how cares? He will just shout this is Sparta!" As Snake accidently mistakes Master Chief.

"Not that SPARTAN. SPARTAN-III is a project to create super-soldiers like if you were a SPARTAN, Snake. You would be powerful, became Hero and even a legend." As Colonel speaks about the SPARTANS.

"Wow, cool" As Snake is surprised.

"But, you will be a not listed as dead in a war." As Colonel explains to snake.

"AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH...BUT NO ONE WILL KNOW IF I'M DEAD OR NOT! I WANT A LAWYER, MY MOTHER, I WANT MY LAWYER'S MOTHER!" As Snake becomes scared.

The codec turns off...

© Konami, Nintendo, Marvel and activison(Deadpool joke) , Bungie , Microsoft. And Warner Bros.(300 joke)

Note: Master Chief Petty Officer Jonh-117 is Master Chief's real name in Halo.

The joke that snake mentions about SPARTANS it's based on the famous 300 film line: THIS IS SPARTA!.

The joke on the end is a gag in marvel ultimate alliance: when you go with Deadpool and talks to Black widow in the last level.


	4. Chapter 4:Son Goku

Snake Custom Codecs: what if these characters were in brawl? Part, 4

The codec is calling to Otacon.

"Snake, watch out!" As Otacon warned Snake.

"What? That spiked hair man?" As Snake questioned Otacon.

"That's Goku. Goku or Kakarot is a sayian warrior. One of the strongest race on the Universe." As Otacon explains to Snake.

"Stronger than the Spartan III project?" as Snake questioned.

"Yes, stronger than Master Chief!" As Otacon answered to Snake.

"AAAAAAAAH, but how?" As Snake questions Otacon.

"Because the name just says it: The Stronger Man of The Universe!" As Otacon answered.

"Knock-it off, that's Super-man." As Snake answers to Otacon

"Was, Super-man." As Otacon explained.

"…" As Snake gets angry.

"Otacon, what does the codec say about his power level?" As Snake questioned.

"Let me see…………IS OVER 90000000000000000000000000000000000" As Otacon shouts the power level.

"WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!….9000!" As Snake gets freaked-up.

The codec is turned off…

Note: The over 9000 joke is based on dragon ball and for master chief see the previous chapter!

© Konami, Nintendo, Akira Toriyama, Ocean group. And Bungie


	5. Chapter 5: Earthworm Jim

Snake Custom Codecs: what if these characters were in brawl? Episode 5

The codec is turned on.

"Man, that's one giant worm." Snake said.

"Snake, that's Earthworm Jim. Earthworm Jim was first released for the SNES rival, The Sega Megadrive or Genesis. Earthworm Jim is like you, Snake. He has whole army of weapons because of his super suit which transformed him into a super hero." The Colonel explained everything about his origins.

"Look, I have a cape. I am Hero, man this worm has stupid story." Snake thinks about his back story being stupid.

"His final smash is___" The colonel was about to say, until…

"Is called ugly as hell" As Snake interrupts the Colonel

"Nope, He would use his own head as a weapon and you would take a one-hit K.O." The Colonel explained.

Until some hacked in the codec.

"Falcon…Head!" Earthworm Jim shouted his final smash.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAARGH!" Snake shouted.

"Snake, are you ok?" The colonel questioned Snake.

"I'm all right, my head is just bleeding." As Snake said.

"(Man, he's losing by a worm.)" The Colonel whispered.

"…" Snake was angry.

The codec is turned off.

Trivia:

This second time snake's codec was hacked, first being Slippy.

Yes, Earthworm Jim was first released for the Genesis.

Copyrights © Konami, Nintendo, Hal laboratories and the studios who made earthworm Jim ( I can't remember the name XD.)


	6. Chapter 6: ScroogeMcDuck

Snake Custom Codecs.

The codec is turning on.

"Mei-Ling, I'm fighting with a duck with a cane." Snake questioned Mei-Ling

"You are fighting Scrooge McDuck. Scrooge was first created by Carls Barks and then made by the Don Rosa comics. Scrooge might be old but he's a very clever archaeologist." As Mei-ling says to Snake.

"Harrison Ford, Lara Croft. A walking person-like duck is ripping off you." Snake alerts them.

George Lucas hacks into the codec

"Actually, he was our roots, so____" As George was going to say.

"FALCON PUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNCH!!!!!!!!!" As Snake punches George Lucas

"Shut up! George Lucas." Snake shut George Lucas mouth.

"Where was I…? Oh Yeah! Snake, Scrooge's powerful move is OMG! The cane!" As Mei-Ling mentions.

"This is his final smash? Man, that's dumber than I thought." Snake answers Mei-Ling.

"NO, SNAKE! THAT'S ONE EXPENSIVE CAAAAAAAAAAAANE!" Mei-Ling shouts to Snake.

"That gave me a heart attack." Snake says to Mei-Ling.

"Are you going to fight him?" Mei-Ling questions.

"ARE YOU CRAZY? HE ONCE DEAFETED VEGETA! Mommy!" As Snake runs like a little idiot.

"(Man, he's losing by a duck)" Mei-Ling whispered.

"WHAT?!?! DID YOU SAY?!" Snake points a bazooka to Mei-Ling's head.

"TURN OFF THE OF THE CODEC!!!!!!!!" As Mei-Ling to myself.

"Okay, Okay. Sheesh what a (censored). The codec is turning off." As I turned the codec off.

© Konami, Carls Barks (Rip), Don Rosa, The magical happiness of Walt Disney and his productions, Nintendo, Datadog , Macaroni-Penguin ,BrentalFloss and ScrewAttacks

Notes:

The fighting Vegeta thing is based on Ducktalez 3 Made by Macarooni-Peguin and Datadog.

The expensive Cane scene made by brentalfloss music ducktales with lyrics.


	7. Chapter 7:Annoying Orange

Snake Custom Codec Returns! Brawler: Annoying Orange

"Hey what's this orange doing in here, where's the brawler? "Snake says.

"Hey, where am I?" Orange says.

"Wow, a talking orange, man, I'm so freaking high." Snake says

"Hey, it's a Gay ."Orange says.

"WHAT? I'm not gay!" Snake shouts.

"Of couse, you are. With this stretchy cloth makes your butt look like a female ." Orange annoys Snake.

"Grrr…"Snake is angered.

"_There is no one near just a gay Rambo with an iPhone here._HAHAHAHA."Orange annoys Snake more.

"My name is SOLID SNAKE! NOT RAMBO!" Snake shouts.

"Sheesh, don't talk about your male "Orange says.

"No, I'm not talking about my male orgasm; I'm talking about my code name." Snake says.

"You see, all agents have different names such as naked snake." Snake says.

"No reason, why you always gets the ."Orange says

"No, I don't get Naked!" Snake is annoyed.

"Hey, Snake!" Orange says.

"WHAT?" Snake says.

"There's a bomb behind you." Orange says.

There's a bo-omb behind snake and explodes throwing Snake out of the field.

"Man, I will miss Gay Rambo named Snake." Orange says.

Orange looks at the codec.

"Oh, An Iphone!" Orange says.

Orange turns on the codec.

"What is it, Snake?"Colonel says.

"Hey, It's Winston Churchill!" Orange says.

"Please, Otacon, don't tell me he is facing the annoying orange." Colonel says.

"That's me! HAHAHAHA."Orange says.

© Nintendo, HAL laboratory, Konami, Dane Boedigheimer, Apple(hey,apple!).


	8. Chapter 8 starring Deadpool

Snake Custom Codecs Returns….again…

The Codec rings.

The codec turns on.

"Otacon, I'm facing Slade Wilson." Snake says.

"Hey, the name is Wade Wilson!" The Brawler replies.

"Oh, that's Deadpool, Snake, he's a marvel character who ripped off deathstroke from the Teen Titans." Otacon said.

"Hey, I saw that!" Deadpool said.

"Don't you mean heard?" Snake replied.

"We're on a fan fiction; I can read the letters above." Deadpool said.

Snake stares at him.

"Anyway, Otacon, give me information about-" Snake is pushed by Deadpool.

Deadpool gets the codec.

"Hey Weasel, why are you helping this guy." Deadpool said.

"Um…My name is not Weasel, its Otacon." Otacon replies to Deadpool.

"Nice try, Weasel, but you have the same glasses, same voice and the same hair, I'm not falling into this joke." Deadpool says.

"But it's true!" Otacon says.

"Yeah, and I am Professor Xavier, I hope you're not eating my cheesy puffs, Weasel!" Deadpool said.

Snake punches Deadpool and sends him out of the area.

Deadpool misses a life.

"Keep talking, Otacon." Snake says.

"He first appeared as a villain in New Mutants, but, later became an anti-hero, he is a well known character because of his jokes and his 4th wall breaking moves." Otacon says.

"He is also the leader of Deadpool Corps, a team which has a team of alternate dimension Deadpools which includes a kid, a woman, a zombie and even a dog version of him." Otacon says.

"Creepy." Snake says.

"Deadpool has also an arsenal of-"

"Incoming!" Deadpool says as he interrupts Otacon.

Snake is about to throw a grenade and Deadpool about to slash him.

When, Snake was going to throw the grenade, Deadpool's sword sticks in it.

"Is that a grenade?" Deadpool asks.

"Uh-oh" Snake says as the grenade explodes.

The grenade throws Snake out of the area and is killed, while, Deadpool survives.

Snake comes back in the arena with one life lost.

"You filthy [Censored by 4Kids -_-]" Snake says.

"Hey watch out for that language, you can only use this kind of language in a mature fan fiction." Deadpool says.

"I will kill you!" Snake says.

Snake is about to punch Deadpool.

"Wait. Since this is your show and I am a nice guy, I will stop talking and you can chat with this Otacon." Deadpool says.

"Nice guy? You cutted my leg off" Otacon says.

Snake and Deadpool are surprised.

"You are not Otacon, aren't you?" Snake says.

"Grrr…Weasel!" Deadpool says in an angry tone.

"Bye, Snake!" Weasel says.

The codec is turned off.

© Konami, Kojima studios, Nintendo, Hal Laboratory,inc., Marvel Entertainment.


	9. Solid Snake: Full Life Consequences

Snake Custom Codecs:

Starring John Freeman!

Solid Terrence Snake, Brother of Liquid Snake, was one day typing on his computer, until a message from colonel that said to Snake, get out of his house and play some brawl, even thought the game is now outdated, but back then it was a superstar.

Snake got into Shadow Moses Island, activating the codec.

Until, John Freeman appeared on his motorcycle and did a back flip and arrived at his destination.

Snake picked up a gun and started to shoot at John Freeman.

But, unfortunately, John Freeman is an over-powered Gary Stu and dodged all the bullets.

Snake thought fast and called Otacon.

Which caused Snake to say:  
"Why isn't Mei-Ling or Colonel in the codec nowadays?"

"Because the episodes that they appeared sucked" Said Otacon.

John Freeman looked angry at Snake and said:

"Where is my Brother, Gordon Freeman?"

And Snake said:

"Morgan Freeman?"

"No, GORDON Freeman, you retard crabmeat zombie punk" John said.

Then Snake loaded his Rocket Launcher and said:

"Enough of this Parody!"

And launched a rocket at John Freeman

John Freeman did a matrix styled dodge in snake's rocket and threw the rocket back at snake.

Snake asked Otacon:

"Could you give me tips or else I die."

Otacon replied:

"You should pick up an Golden Hammer that it's right there!"

Snake tried to pick up the hammer, but unfortunately, John Freeman runned at the speed of sound and picked up the golden hammer.

Then, John beated the crap out of snake and his codec broke :(

Snake thinked fast and said:

"What's the title of this fanfic?"

John wondered, but Snake shot at his head and John Freeman died.

Snake was victorious, but unfortunately Mei-Ling and Colonel never appeared again.

©Nintendo, Konami, Valve, squirrelking (because this is a parody of his fanfic(which he did just for comedy)), SEGA, Cookie Jar Entertainment (former Dic)(Because of the Sonic Sez Parodies).

Know, the 1st episode of:

Sonic Sez!

Sonic: "Kids, there is nothing more ridiculous than the Playstation Network.

I was playing Killzone 3 when it stoped working, because some hacker managed to hack PSN and Playstation Store.

Now the Hackers have my Credit Card Number, address and my PSN account.

So what do you do?

First, you call Master Chief to blow up the Sony building.

Then, you get out of there, most importantly; you have to switch to play online on another console like the Xbox 360, Wii or the Sega Dreamca-

Oh wait….

The Sega Dreamcast seized to exist long time ago….

Well just keep playing your games!"


	10. The Real Deal:Sonic the hedgehog codec

Snake Custom Codecs:

What should have been Sonic's codec message!

Snake enters in the battlefield,

"Man, this game still exists? It's already outdated; people are playing Marvel vs. Capcom 3 and Mortal Kombat nowadays." Snake says to himself.

Snake turns on the codec.

"Snake, are you hearing me?" Otacon said.

"Yep, I am freaking hearing you." Snake says.

"It has been a year, since this fanfic isn't updated. I was starting to get nervous and scared" Otacon says.

"Well at least you didn't pee all over the place just like in Metal Gear Solid and Metal Gear Solid: Twin Snakes!" Snake says

"Well, yeah, but thank god the doctor gave me-Hey! I had played 4 consecutive hours of Silent Hill that night and Grey Fox had a large katana pointed at me!" Otacon says

"Anyway, who is my opponent?" Snake asks?

"Well, I didn't know Batman was invited at this? Where is the Justice League, Batman?"

"OH. MY. GOD! " Snake says.

"Introducing me, myself and I, Sonic The Hedgehog!" Sonic introduces himself.

"Otacon, I want a assault rifle, Two heavy pistols, A turret and a Metal Gear." Snake says.

"You don't have metal gear, Snake." Otacon says.

"Well, BUY ME ONE! I want to kill this annoying character!" Snake Says.

"Ah….We just met batman and you're already trying to kill me? Come on, let's stop fighting and play baseball or some-"

Snake shoots Sonic in his torso.

"I'm not Batman." Snake says

"Oh, I forgot to say my catchphrase *cleans throath* Long time no see, batman." Sonic says.

"Who did you recover so fast" Snake says.

"Well, I'm Sonic, speed is game, and what time is it? Time for a cheesy joke!" Sonic says.

"Get out of here, you abomination from nature!" Snake says.

Snake shots at sonic, but he vanishes.

"Where is he now?" Snake says.

"I'm right here." Sonic says as he is the lower platform of the Shadow Moses Island stage.

"You know, you should focus on your target instead of quickly shooting at it." Sonic says.

"What is this? Another one of those Sonic Sez videos on youtube, no thanks." Snake says

Snake shoots at sonic, but he vanishes again.

"Behind you!" Sonic says as he shows he is behind snake.

Snake shoots again, but he vanishes.

"Uwa ̄, dono yōna subarashii keshiki!(Wow, what a great view in Japanese)" Sonic says as he is in the top of snake's head.

Snake picks an assault rifle and starts shooting at his head, but nothing happens, as Sonic once again, dodges.

"You little [Censored by 4Kids entertainment], let me show who is the boss around here!" Snake says.

Snake picks up a rocket launcher and fires a rocket

The rocket hits sonic with full force

"Now, he is dead, right Otacon? Otacon? Otacon can you read me!" Snake says.

"Yeah, clear, I was playing Sonic 2 for more research and I wouldn't throw a rocket, if I were you I wouldn't throw a rocket." Otacon says.

"Why not?" Snake says.

Sonic appears all injured and his eyes were red.

"You know, Snake, you shouldn't have done that to me, basically, that hurted a lot." Sonic says angrily

"Otacon, his eyes are red." Snake says.

"Maybe he didn't sleep well." Otacon says.

"I meant his pupils." Snake says.

"Oh…Then let me do my research on wikipe- I mean, I will do my research." Otacon says.

"NOW I WILL SHOW YOU!" Sonic shouts as he becomes Super Sonic.

He brutally attacks snake a lot, it looked like a mortal kombat because of how bloody it was.

"That will teach him a lesson" Sonic says.

Snake manages to survive and picks up a gun he points at sonic, until…

"Hey Sonic, I brought your chili-"

Snake shoots at Tails accidentally.

"NO!" Sonic shouts.

"Argh!" Tails screams in pain.

"Don't worry, everything is going to be okay! Don't worry!" Sonic says.

"I think I'm not going to make it, sonic, I am already seeing the light." Tails says.

"No, you got to survive." Sonic says.

"Don't worry, I will be okay in the afterlife." Tails says.

"No, chilidog, don't left me." Sonic says.

"I will not-Wait, what?" Tails gets confused.

"Don't left me, please….Chili dog? CHILI DOOOOOG!" Sonic shouts.

As we see flashback moments of sonic and his chilidog: such as them going to the park, licking ice cream, taking photos, playing baseball, etc.

As everyone in the smash bros. brawl roster including Snake and Otacon goes to Chilidog's funeral.

They are all dressed in black, crying, except Snake, he feels guilty.

"Hey! Why ain't anyone in my funeral." Tails says.

"Shut up, corpse!" Sonic shouts.

©Nintendo, Sega, Konami, Kojima studios.


End file.
